Sunday, February 28, 2016

Arsenal Bottle It Again, Lose 3-2 to United, Title Hopes Go Up In Flames

God dammit. GOD. DAMMIT. That was pathetic. Lose 3-2 to a team that is, by all accounts, worse than  you are. United are in an injury crisis, basically playing sub and under-21's, manager has been rumored for weeks on end about his job security and we get thrashed. Those two goals are two VERY quick blips on the radar. United rolled on Arsenal.

Theo Walcott shouldn't start another game this season, not even in the FA Cup. He disappeared today. Giroud wasn't any more productive but at least he fought and showed some drive. Aaron Ramsey was piss-poor, as has been the case recently. For some perspective, their stats:
Ramsey-9 wayward passes, 4 losses of possession, more here.

Walcott completed just 4 passes int he first half, two of them coming from kickoff. Disgraceful. Ramsey can't link midfield and the attack to save his life and bombs upfield to leave Coquelin out to dry. Alexis hasn't been the same since before his injury, our midfield isn't the same since Cazorlas injury. Ramsey had a good look to equalize late. Heavy touch/unnecessary touch in the box=turnover.

A lot of it stems from the top. What else can I say about Wenger that hasn't already been said? He inspires nothing in his team, is complacent and then makes excuses after the games. Today?

SHUT. UP. You lost to teenagers! You could also spend the bountiful money at your disposal and choose not to! Is it a pride thing? You think winning a title through money isn't as great an accomplishment? Newsflash, Wengy. A trophy is still a trophy no matter how much money you spend to win it. "But Leicester are going to win without spending!" Yeah, and they're a rare case. Chelsea, City, United have won every league title since 2004. They spend to put a good product out there.

Putting Iwobi out there was a horrible move if he truly was trying to get back into the game. Joel Campbell has been fantastic this season aside form a recent stretch of bad form. He needs to play, especially over Iwobi.

There's no heart. Players, save for a select few, just don't give a damn it seems like. That's maybe the most disheartening of all. Go down fighting for God's sake.

You can see Ozil isn't taking this well either. And I don't blame him. He's such a higher level than everyone else oaths team its absurd. Tech is close to him, and an in-form Alexis as well. Everyone else looks like pond scum compared to him. If the rumors are true he wants to be sold and leave in the summer, I won't be mad. He's in his prime and wants to win. What will happen if we sell? Wenger will say, "Look! I spent money on a top player and it didn't win us a championship! Money doesn't solve it!" Maybe you're the problem Arsene. I'm slowly turning to the Wenger Out side, something I never thought I'd do. Mourinho could get a better result. Caleb Porter could get a better result.

So now Leicester, or even worse, Tottenham, will win the league, we'll battle for 3rd. Tottenham will surely finish above us in the standings for the first time ever. We won't do jack shit in the summer to improve our team. Rinse, repeat.

At this rate I doubt Arsenal could win the MLS Cup.
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Tuesday, February 23, 2016

Today In Paul Pogba's Hair

Previously in Paul Pogba's hair...
Dude has the best barber/stylist ever. Like I've said before, Pogba might be the shaggiest person, not just in soccer, but in sports overall. There aren't many people who could pull off the styles and do's he does. Fantastic player. Charisma for days. Likable to. Win-win-win. He hit the holy trinity.
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Sunday, February 21, 2016

Soccer Player Grabs The Ref's Red Card And Shows It To Him

Source-Trabzonspor's Salih Dursun did what every player has secretly wanted to do to a referee after a questionable call.
In the last minutes of the Turkish Super Lig match between Galatasaray and Trabzonspor, the referee showed a red card to Trabzonspor's Luis Cavanada and called a penalty in favor of Galatasaray.
The game was 1-1, and two Trabzonspor players had already been shown red cards. As one would imagine, tempers were flaring.
After the ref showed Cavanada red, the card got knocked from his hand and Salih Dursun could not resist.


Amazing. Like it says above, every player has wanted to give a ref a red card, and this guy made those dreams come true. We need to work the card system into our everyday lives. Safer way of showing disapproval. Buddy drank the last beer? Red card. Kid didn't take out the trash? Red card. Guy at the mall stole your parking spot? Red card. Dog pooped in the house? Best believe that's a red card. Send that ass off right away and throw their name in the book. No yellows though. Real life cards are red or nothing. Never get in a fight again, at least until; someone grabs the red card and shows it to you like in the video. Then fists will probably fly. 

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Thursday, February 18, 2016

The Best Of Metro Boomin' Tweets

The latest Twitter/meme craze has to do with Metro Boomin', a producer from St. Louis. He's worked with a ton of big names in the rap industry. Future (a lot), Drake, Migos, Young Thug, Travis Scott, Fetty Wap and Kanye to name a few. He just did work on Kanye's "TLOP "and is rumored to be working on "Views From The 6" with Drake. At the beginning of a bunch of songs he's produced you here Future go, "If Young Metro don't trust you I'm gon' shoot you". You can here it at the start of Jumpman:
And Purple Reign:


And Father Stretch My Hands Pt. 1: 



And now people have turned that line into a meme. The best I could find...

J.E.B. don't play. He let the world know he's packing heat now, and he for sure's gonna put that to good use. You best hope Metro trusts you, or else Jeb will be all over your ass.




What I said about Jeb? Goes double for Ned Flanders. Holiest hitman there ever was. Amen.


Wet Bandits are lucky Metro Boomin' wasn't born yet. Otherwise Kevin Mcallister  would've substituted the BB Gun for a Desert Eagle.


Mmmm whatcha sayyyyyyy, mmmmm that you only meant welllllll.....


Jumpman, Jumpman, Jumpman, Jumpman, Jumpman, Jumpman. I just seen the Falcon take off, Skywalker's up to the somethin'.


 Purple Reign Unchained.


"Target confirmed as untrustworthy. Metro has given the green light. I repeat, green light. Shoot on your call."
Omar got a code. If Metro don't trust you, you best believe Omar comin'.

 My personal favorite...
I've said it before. I admit my bias.
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Wednesday, February 17, 2016

The Revs Want Your Picks For This Season's Goal Songs

Pre-season kicking off officially with an actual tournament (Desert Diamond Cup), opening day on March 6th, home opener March 12th. It's almost Revs season. Just one bit of business to take care of. Goal song. They've used "The Boys Are Back" the past two season since it's state mandate the Dropkick Murphy's are a part of every professional sporting event in the New England region.
But they've opened up the polls for suggestions for this season. In all honesty, it'll be that song again, and I really don't mind. It seems to get the crowd going a little, and can be sung along with, which is big for goal songs. Get the crowd into and singing. But I may as well throw my suggestions out there as well...

Hey Now (Mean Muggin')-X-Zibit
We're turning Gillette Stadium into Stomp The Yard after every goal. Great beat, good chorus, able to sing along ("Heyyy now, heyyy now"). Gives us some street cred. Maybe even toss a sweet Pimp My Ride car in front of the Fort with hydraulics, really trick out our goals.

All I Do Is Win-DJ Khaled
Maybe have to use this for one player and player only. Do I even have to say it? 
All he does is Nguyen. (I hate myself for that)

Here Comes the Money-Shane O'Mac's Theme
Another player-specific choice. It'll only work if a certain someone re-signs for the amount he wants though...

Harder Than You Think (Instrumental)-Public Enemy
Great, unique beat. Elements of rock and rap in it. Good beat drop. Loud, boisterous. Fans can hum along. Wouldn't be a bad choice. 

Avicii
Literally any song. Wake Me Up, Levels, The Nights, etc. Good beats and drops to get the crowd going. 

 

Turbulence-Steve Aoki and Laidback Luke
Similar to Avicii in that it's an EDM/dance song. But it's faster paced, and just sounds more like celebratory goal song. Downside: It now reminds me of this Dutch airplane captain-looking fan from the World Cup in 2014. 


We Can't Stop-Miley Cyrus
Good lyrics for a home team. "This is our house, these are our rules. And we can't stop, and we won't stop." Fans can sing along, another good beat (notice a trend). If it seems a little too slow paced you can grab a faster paced remix to satisfy you. Downside, much like Turbulence: It reminds me of Miley Cyrus. 
Make it stop.

Can't Stop-Red Hot Chili Peppers
Following the trend of not being able to stop (scoring goals, see what I did there?). That initial guitar is perfect as a build. Fans can sing along. Another good option.

Trap Queen (Crankdat Remix)-Fetty Wap
The Bernie Sanders of the music world gets some tweaking and it becomes a great goal song. Catchy, can sing along, good beat and drop. Popular enough that the older fans and parents may have heard about it and can promptly ask the youth what exactly a trap queen is and why this man want's to bake pies with her. Song brings the energy, and that's exactly what you need. 

I Took A Pill In Ibiza (SeeB Remix)-Mike Posner

One of my favorite songs the past few months. The instrumental starting around 0:57 would be great to hear after goals. Though I could see people saying the tempo isn't quite there like we see with some other choices. I admit my bias though.

Hip Hop Hooray-Naughty By Nature
Fantastic old-school rap beat that I think a lot of people would know. Chorus is good for singing along, especially when it just goes "Heyyyy, hoooooo, heyyyyyy, hooooo". And then you have the arms waving back and forth at that part. That could be huge for a crowd. Make it all our own. Scare the opponents right back onto the bus.

Rick Ross Saying "Balling, Balling Like I Play For New England" A Bunch Of Times

From the song "Pop That" by French Montana. I really hope I don't need to explain this one to you...
Would also work as a lead in to any goal song, or end for that matter. God damn Revolution, involve this somehow. Ricky Rozay has blessed you with this line, don't be foolish.

And last but not least...

Pipe It Up-Migos
#TAILGATESZN

UPDATE: One I can't believe I forgot about. AC/DC, For Those About To Rock. It would be AWESOME after goals. Like I said above: good beat (it's slow but feels intense, gets you amped) and you can sing along. And then there's the fact they literally queue the Militia Men that fire muskets after every Revs goal with "FIRE!". So goddamn perfect I went right by it.

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Tuesday, February 16, 2016

Arsenal Fan Celebrates Welbeck's Goal Too Hard, Needs Hernia Surgery

We've all been there as fans. Something incredible happens and you celebrate too hard or too quick. I remember when Brady dropped that dime to Lafell in the AFC Divisional game against the Ravens last season I hopped out of my chair so fast I almost fell. Granted I was at my grandparents house and for whatever reason they have fairly polished and slippery floors coupled with chairs that have little to no traction on the legs. But then when Duron Harmon picked off Cool Joe Flacco to end it I did end up slipping. Jumped up so fast the chair shot out from under me and I landed on my back. So I get where this guy is coming from. Hard not to destroy a hernia after that finish either...


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Jerod Mayo Announces His Retirement On Instagram

Thus ends an era. Amy has been a fan favorite in his 8 years as a Patriot.  I'll be very interested to see how this story progresses as more information comes out. Whether Mayo was planning on retirement already, or if he got cut and decided to call it quits. I can see a scenario where retirement was always the plan unless New England brought him back, and once they didn't, or didn't guarantee him future contract talks, he decided to call it. I'd love to see him remain involved with the team, helping to coach up the youngsters and instill some of the mental aspect into raw guys like Collins and Hightower.

Mayo was a guy who fit the Patriot mold perfectly. Hard-nosed player who was team-first. He saw his role shrink this year and was absolutely OK with it if it meant helping the team win, and playing to his best abilities when called upon. It's not easy for a veteran to be suddenly displaced like that, and he handled it with professionalism.

As Kyed also brought up, the money the Pats save from his retirement helps them a lot in trying to sign draft picks, free agents, or Collins/Hightower.

Never forget....


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Thursday, February 11, 2016

Revs Reveal 2016 Primary Kit, And They're Very Pretty To Look At

Those are downright sexual. HOT HOT HOT. Fantastic jerseys from the Revs and Adidas. Glad to see PSG donated the leftover tops from last season to. 
If titles were based on kits, we'd have two in a row. Between last years Road Red reveal and now tonight? Forget it. Season cant get here soon enough.

PS-Are we going with Foxboro Saint Germain or Paris Saint Gillette? 


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Revs Acquire Midfielder Gershon Koffie From Vancouver


Source-The New England Revolution today announced the acquisition of midfielder Gershon Koffie from Vancouver Whitecaps FC in exchange for general allocation money and targeted allocation money (TAM). As part of the trade, Vancouver will receive a percentage of any future transfer fees obtained by New England. Koffie is expected to join the club in Tucson for preseason.

 Koffie, 24, will join the Revolution following his fifth season with Vancouver Whitecaps FC. Having been with Vancouver since its inaugural MLS season in 2011, Koffie holds the club’s career record for most regular season appearances with 133.


Big news out of Gillette Stadium. With Xavier Kouassi now out (and the fact he wasn't going to join anyway until July-ish) the Revs front office has apparently accelerated a move for Gershon Koffie. Jeff Lemieux, the Revs staff writer and online host, is reporting there was already interest in Koffie, but the Kouassi news seemingly forced the FO's hand. The fact we only gave up money as well is a huge plus.

This is a great signing. Koffie being just 24 with over 100 MLS caps since 2011 is huge. An experienced player about to enter his prime. He was a fan favorite in Vancouver as well. He's also reuniting with Tommy Soehn, the man who brought him from Ghana to the Whitecaps. He's a gritty midfielder, which is how Kouassi was described and something the Revs need. His one knock I've seen is his consistency. He also gets a lot of fouls and yellow cards, but I don't see that as too much of an issue. With those two and Scotty Caldwell being young and roaming the midfield in rotation, Revs fans have something exciting to look forward to.

And this is just my hunch, but I said Kouassi may have ended the Jermaine Jones Era. Him being injured re-opened the door. Now with Koffie and Kouassi under contract, albeit with only one able to play, JJ may see the door start to shut and either walk or take less money. If K&K (just came up with their nickname, nbd) were both healthy, I think Jones is definitely done here. But it wouldn't be a bad idea to let him continue to mentor the young midfielders.

Koffie is also int he process of switching his FIFA allegiance to Canada, so once that goes through he's going to be playing for a spot on Canada's national team, so I think it's safe to say he's going to absolutely ball out in New England. Whitecaps fans on Reddit are very sad about this move, giving me even more reason to believe this is a fantastic signing.

And now, highlights:


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Arsenal Is Coming Back To The United States To Play The MLS All Stars On July 28th

YES! LET'S GOOOOOOOO!!! If you haven't figured it out by now, Arsenal is my Premier League club. Been following them closely since 2013, but I've been a distance fan I guess you'd call it. I've had an Arsenal winter hat for a while (shoutout mom for buying that in London) and I named mine of my 3v3 Soccer teams "Arsenal". Even made my number 14 for Thierry Henry whose name I absolutely used to butcher back in the day (you get more cultured with age, so really I'm fine and can take no blame).

 I didn't get to see them when they played in New York (New Jersey really, but don't tell New Yorkers) in 2014. But know that they're playing the MLS All Stars in San Jose on July 28th and the game will be nationally televised, I'll be all over it. The MLS All Stars have been playing European teams regularly since 2005. It's actually been pretty competitive as well. The last two have been 2-1 wins over Tottenham and Bayern Munich. They've beat Chelsea twice before as well. And they've lost to. Roma, Manchester United (twice) and Everton have all beaten on the leagues best in the past.

It's not like the teams have been bringing slouches either. I mean they do, but they bring stars as well. Last year Tottenham started Harry Kane, Eric Dier and Christian Eriksen among others, and sued more good players on. Bayern Munich two years ago rolled out David Alaba, Xherdan Shaqiri and Robert Lewandowski before going down 2-1 in the 70th minute and bringing on Arjen Robben, Thomas Muller, Bastian Schweinsteiger and (again) other very good players. Hell, Landon Donovan scored the game-winner in Manuel Neuer, the best goalkeeper in the world. Seriously, go look at the other games and tell me any of the guest teams played entirely with scrubs. Now, maybe the guys, at least in the early years, took the game lightly and more as a vacation. And maybe there's an agreement between the league and the guest team to play star players. But as we saw the past two years, they do want to win. They may have the mindset that they are playing against inferior soccer players, and to lose would be an embarrassment. Hell, after the 2014 game Bayern's boss Pep Guardiola refused to shake Caleb Porter's hand and wouldn't let his players mingle with the MLSers afterwards.
But here's the thing this year. There's so much going on in terms of international competitions this summer, it'll be hard for Arsenal to field a squad close to full strength. Euro 2016 is June 10 to July 10, Copa America Centenario is June 3 to June 26, and the Olympics are August 5 to August 21. So many players on the roster factor into their national teams that are competing in these events. Players coming back from he first two would maybe need time off after a grueling season and then the competitions after them, and those called into Olympic camps would likely be gone before the All Star Game.

I'll hold out hope we get major stars for the game, but even just seeing Arsene Wenger patrolling the sidelines would be worth it.
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Wednesday, February 10, 2016

NYCFC and Columbus Crew Unveiled New Kits Today

The MLS offseason. A time where teams get linked to a bunch of players almost no one has heard of (maybe juts the Revs actually) and teams unveil new kits for the new season. Let's first go to NYCFC and the ew secondary kit...

I'm torn. Not a good jersey but far from the worst I've seen. I actually really liked the black secondaries they used last year:
The light blue and orange accents really worked well with the black. With his year's I keep flip flopping between hating it and it being tolerable. Like I said, not the worst ever, but probably the worst of this season. Now, on to Columbus' new primaries...


Ohhhhh myyyyyy godddddd... I spoke too soon. THOSE are the ugliest jerseys of the season. I mean, wow. They went with the flag of Columbus for the inspiration, but that's not a great source for beauty either.

Columbus actually had really nice uniforms last year. Simple designs with great colors.
This year's look like someone took a white top and peed down the middle. Or used a can of yellow spray paint and ran out after going down the middle. And then adding in the light blue shorts and reddish accents? Gross. So gross. 
They all look thrilled to be wearing these. 

PS-Revs new primaries drop tomorrow, so I'll be all over that. They upgraded the secondaries to a sweet red,white and green modeled after the New England flag, so hopefully the blues don't disappoint. 


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Best of Bobby Wood's Facebook Q&A

U.S. Soccer's resident Flyin' Hawaiian Bobby Wood did a Q&A on the U.S. Soccer Facebook page earlier. It was brief, but here are some of the best answers.

Never been to Hawaii but I love the culture and vibe. That said, SPAM is maybe the last thing I'd want to eat after an athletic event. Disgusting. And those better have been original Capri Sun and none of this Roaring' Water garbage. And preferably Strawberry Kiwi, though any of the Punches or Coolers are acceptable. Grape can kick rocks. 

Go for the neck Bobby!!! Calling out 1860 Munich and tagging them in it is power move city.

The Flyin' Hawaiian and Jewish Messi. Irvine Strikers practices must have looked like an FC Barcelona match. 

Continuing on yesterday's themes, poor Ronaldo. Getting faced by Messi yet again. 

I think I found the core issue with US Soccer, and the men's teams specifically. You can talk about tactics, training, fitness, youth development, etc. But the core problem? The root of our frustrations? The guys are listening to Meek Mill. That has to be put to an end. Meek Mill may be a good rapper, but the guy has taken more L's than the USMNT this past year, and that's saying something. That's not the right mindset to have. Listen to winners, not guys who are the second most famous rapper in the family. Stop letting our players listen to Meek Mill and maybe we see some tournament wins. I just fixed U.S. Soccer, no thanks needed. #MakeTheUSMNTAboveAverageAgain 

And now, Bobby Wood highlights: 



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Tuesday, February 9, 2016

Leo Messi Reportedly Outbids Ronaldo For A Car


Source-Lionel Messi scored another win over rival Cristiano Ronaldo with a €32.1 million (£25m) purchase of classic Ferrari, according to Spanish newspaper Sport.

The 1957 Ferrari 335 S Spider Scaglietti owned by Italian billionaire Alessandro Proto went on sale last week at the Artcurial Motorcars Retromobile 2016 in Paris and fetched the world-record fee.

The identity of the buyer has been kept anonymous but Sport claim a press release from Proto's company has suggested Messi could have won the auction with Ronaldo also a keen bidder.

Messi does it again. Beat Ronaldo for the Ballon d'Or this year, four times total since 2010. Generally considered to be a better player, and better teammate, and better person than CR7. And now he steals a car right out form under him. Ronaldo's chance to say "HA! I have more disposable income than you!" and Messi just spits in his eye. 

And how about the price of this car? Over $36 million for that? 
I guess it's worth more since it was driven by a legendary F1 driver, Stirling Moss, in the 1958 Cuban Grand Prix. You always get more for game used memorabilia. But I don't think I'd be able to drive that. It's a mix of I din't want to be the guy who breaks the world's most expensive car, and it just doesn't look drive-able on multiple levels. Safety features are probably poor, and I'm not too into retro looks when it comes to cars. And for those reasons, I'm out. 
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Today In Paul Pogba's Hair

A video posted by Paul Labile Pogba (@paulpogba) on


Previously...
A photo posted by Paul Labile Pogba (@paulpogba) on


Another week, another fantastic hairstyle from Paul Pogba. There's swag and then there's whatever Pogba has going on. Dude drips charisma. Soccer's first Dab Daddy. Leopard print. And now a goddamn Poke Ball? That's an A+ in my book. And he's really the only guy I think could pull this off. Other guys have swag, but no one can match Pogba. Ronaldo? Fantastic player, confident, can't do this. Mario Balotelli? Has the charisma, confident, but not good enough for the hair Pogba pulls off. Same goes for Daniel Sturridge. Go on Paul. Go on.

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